![]() Still curious? Wikipedia has a handy glossary of BDSM terms here. Vanilla refers to a person who is not into BDSM, or any related scenes “ The Scene” refers to The BDSM community at large Play may refer to BDSM activities, can be more specific (impact play, rope play, ect.)Ī scene, is either a private bit of “play” or a semi-public demonstration/performance of the same. ![]() I personally will describe myself as submissive, though I’m not always thrilled with it’s connotations. Other terms for dominant include: Dom, (often, but not exclusively male) Domme, (always female) Master, Mistress, Sir, Ma’am, Owner, and many more.įor submissives some common terms are: sub, (sometimes specifically Malesub or Femsub) slave, pet or toy.īe aware that if you start using a term, there are people for whom it probably denotes a specific status that they will want to argue about, other people are happy to let anyone use any title willy-nilly. In this case however, I beleive the top is also a domme, see how that works? Here is a top giving sensation to a bottom’s bottom. A dominant is someone who exercises control over a submissive who cedes control to the dominant. There are a number of terms for the roles which a person may inhabit during the practice of BDSM and while so many of these have been used interchangeably to the point of uselessness I should define a few here.Ī Top is someone who gives sensations and a Bottom is someone who receives them. The Common abbreviations for these are B&D, D/s and S&m, respectively. I do hope what I write here is useful for everybody who reads it, but I am a submissive man and my interest and insight pertains mainly to a monogamous female dominant/male submissive pairing.īDSM, for the uninitiated is a compound acronym for Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism. I must admit that a great deal of my motivation in compiling this guide is to provide a resource to potentially dominant women that does not treat D/s like a vaguely disgusting way to get your man to clean the gutters or an scene-centric lifestyle that requires one go “all in” if you want to be authentic. The Virgins Guide to Dominance and Submission, is my attempt to provide a less than intimidating introduction to the topic of BDSMĪs a virgin myself, I can only give so much advice. First, I have what seems to be an unique perspective on the subject and secondly I have included the words “Don’t Panic” in large friendly letters here at the top. While there are many, undoubtedly more complete and informed works on the subject of BDSM I am hoping that readers will enjoy this one for two reasons. ![]()
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